THIS RANT 18/06/2002
Unravelling Big Brother dialogue
As most Gusworld visitors will know, I'm a fairly big Big Brother fan. But even I've been frustrated in recent weeks by some of the dumb remarks made by the housemates when nominating each other, or after they get booted out the door. For the benefit of casual viewers, here's a guide to some common Big Brother expressions.
| What they say | What they really mean |
| "They can be really difficult to bond with sometimes." | "I wouldn't spit on them if they were on fire." |
| "I wanted to have a lot of different experiences in the house." | "I'm going to sleep with everyone until I get evicted." |
| "They're all such beautiful people." | "God, I hope they're too sick to go to the party after the last show." |
| "My philosophy in the house was just to be myself." | "I am such a poser you would not believe it." |
| "This is the best party/week/dinner ever." | "I am incredibly two-faced/unutterably bored." |
| "I knew I was going to leave this week." | "I can't believe you fuckers voted for me instead of Jessica." |
| "Gretel, that outfit looks incredible." | "What drugs is her stylist taking?" |
| "[Insert housemate name] has always been there for me." | "We had a drunken D&M in the spa once." |
| "I'm just in here to have a good time." | "Hi, my name's Marty." |
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